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FORUM > Listening to God > Relationships do matter. how true.


Relationships do matter. how true. From: June Ritchie 25 Aug 2012 (11:27)
Have often thought about the way a disciple\'s life and witness can be wrecked by their attitude towards relationships with others. And yes in particular with one\'s husband/wife. This week Jim and I celebrated our 48th wedding anniversary and did so happily knowing that the game of love is for life.
And yet no it has not been a smooth running amount of years for us we have had to work on it and many crises decide to stand together is best rather than to pull apart. Before salvation we were (and are) very different in lots of ways.
So there have been long term issues they were worst at the beginning before salvation came into our home. Six years of pain and stress then jesus came in and when He did that was the start of change in our relationship.
He sorted us both out and showed us both that each has differing characters and each has their own points of view. I was lumbered at the start for I have never agreed with divorce as an answer i was actually afraid of it and knew I would never have the courage etc to have such a thing in my life.
There are some marvellous Christian ministries around here in England at one of the toughest points of our marriage with a strange home in a strange town we were recommended to try one called \'MARRIAGE ENCOUNTER\'
This movement gives free weekends usually in large conference hotels etc it is run by a team of disciples who are married who go through their own life issues to show by encouraging each couple to have dialogue and resolve stressful problems. That was the start of something good in our life together! we came away vastly different than we went and learnt whilst there the value of a love letter even when in a lengthy time married.
it was a turning point for us and it re-inforced a feeling in my own heart that there is an alternative to divorce for Christians if they will find it and pray for it to happen. we have attended three of those weekends just so that we could take other couples who were friends of ours. We saw lovely things happen and saw couples turn from the divorce they had been contemplating to fall in love all over again.
Relationships matter all of them. Previously I was a first class nagger and it was a bind on both of us. We pick up bad habits from unsaved parents and only Jesus can change those not always easy but He will if we ask Him.
Always having to be right and always having to have the last word yes that is all part of it and how it affects our bond with others.
Everyone has their opinion about everything under the sun it takes great strength of character to let things go when different points of view appear.
Paul talks about biting and devouring one another and stresses the danger of it. Learning to keep it buttoned even if we feel others are wrong sometimes is essential if we want peace in our lives.
Friendship is precious and fellowship is even more precious whilst communication in marriage is the most precious of all! Its amazing how many of us are so determined to voice an opinion that we forget. communication is a two way thing with two voices not one and two hearts not one and yes with two characters not one. A judgemental attitude makes us lose friends, a dogmatic view does the same. So wheres the cure?
It\'s in a book I wrote called SELF DETHRONED. To die to self is a personal thing and it depends on our willingness to let go of what and who we are to take on a more Christ-like spirit. When in the midst of that dying to self thing it is tough but it is also the very best thing that can happen to us for we come out at the other side smelling sweeter ? LOL
Reltionships form attitudes and wrong attitudes can wreck relationships we have to let them die. We have to measure them with the cross. Feeling the nails and the whip and just forgive. Weaknesses are human and thats a problem but there is a cure His name is JESUS. blessings to all. June
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